The caption was “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?” The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

“Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.

They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns.

They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.

They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds.

They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

Mermaids do not exist.

But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?

They would have no sex life and could not bear children.

Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.

And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

Without a doubt, I’d rather be a whale.

At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn’t enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.

We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.

Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: “How amazing am I ?! ”
———–

Can you imagine how much stress it would take out of a person’s life to be happy with what is, to adopt an attitude like the lady in the story?

People may think that this is just an excuse or a justification to be overweight, but it’s not.

It is a very brave statement to accept oneself  ‘as is’ and to make a CHOICE whether we want to change something about it or not. And if we want to change it, then it is because we choose to do so from our own motivation, not because someone else or the media dictates what’s right or wrong, what’s good or bad, what’s in or out.

This is authentic living at its best: making your own choices and being content with who you are.

(The girl on the picture is French model Tara Lynn) Story shared on facebook by Delphine Fieberg

How often have you heard it or even thought or said it yourself today?

We may use other words, but the statement is the same. We experience a lot of stress from the moment we get out of bed until we – often exhausted – fall back into it and even beyond.

Constant stress is one of the most serious causes for un-resourceful behaviour that initiates even more stress.

But is stress really our enemy?

In fact, stress is a very important factor when it comes to survival, because it helps the body to prepare for fight or flight.

The purpose of stress is to enable us to react to a stressor (stress factor), allowing us to quickly adapt to changing circumstances.

Stress also supports our development, because every effort and solution requires a certain amount of stress energy. It brings out the best in us. Top performances wouldn’t be possible without it, as they require a controlled amount of stress.

Like with many things it is the ‘too much’ that is harmful for body, mind and soul. Stress can only be useful, when it is controlled, managed, and dealt with resourcefully.

But how do we do that?

There are three starting points for stress management:

1. Stressors – changing your environment

Knowing what stresses you is a good place to start with. Once you know that, you can then work on ways to either eliminate, reduce or even avoid your stress factors.

For example you could

• turn off the phone or radio during a break, meeting or when you want to have some ‘me-time’ (eliminate)
• turn down the volume of phone, radio or other devices or shut the door to reduce noise when you need to work concentrated (reduce)or
• take another route to work, start earlier or later or even switch your way of transportation completely to public transport if you want to avoid the rush hour or road rage

2. ‘Self-Management’ – managing your stress response

Managing your stress response means learning how to create long-term health and wellbeing strategies and a resourceful attitude to

• cultivate or increase resistance (through active relaxation
• develop skills for an optimistic, positive mindset
• change the perception of the situation

3. ‘Agitation management’ – finding ways for an immediate response adjustment

In an acute stress situation it is useful to be able to refer back to more resourceful short-term techniques to influence your immediate response in order to avoid agitation peaks or the build-up of (negative) spiralling effects.

Short term health and wellbeing strategy options to reduce, cope with or prevent stress include

• Spontaneous relaxation
• Perception channelling
• Positive self-talk
• Venting -release from immediate pressure

Great natural and non-invasive alternatives to drugs, alcohol, medication, smoking or other health compromising choices are systematic muscle relaxation, autogenic training or breathing techniques, asking yourself power-questions or learning how to use self-suggestions or affirmations effectively.

In the long run, prevention is better than cure and dealing with the effects of stress is essential. Stress is always individual and usually home made, which means it is a learned behaviour or results from impractical habits.

The good thing is that every learned behaviour or behavioural pattern can also be unlearned, replaced or changed.

Stress can impact your body, mind and spirit on four levels:

1. Cognitive level – all mental processes – thoughts and senses
2. Emotional level – all feelings and sensitivities
3. Vegetal-hormonal level – all reactions of the autonomous nervous system and the connected organ processes that are normally not consciously controlled, like hormones
4. Muscular level – reactions of the muscular skeleton system, those that can be controlled consciously

This means that different stressors require different stress responses. How you experience stress mainly will give you a good indicator how to best deal with it.

For long-term health and wellbeing you may want to consider a strategy that involves relaxation (regular massages, meditation in motion…) or intentional exercises to calm the mind and strengthen the body, creating a supportive network or attending personal development workshops or seminars that teach self-management and life leadership skills.

With knowledge always comes responsibility,which is why some people choose to rather not pursue to find out what they are uniquely designed to do.

Many ask themselves “What will happen if I find out what my purpose is but fail to live/achieve it?” instead of embracing the opportunity to experience a life that is filled with meaning and  – well, purpose.

It sure takes courage, determination, commitment, most likely a lot of perseverance and sometimes support and guidance to perform such a task.

So here is a simple 5-step process, as explained in an easy-to-remember analogy on five fingers by Mat Boggs, that can help you to become aware of a destination that can spark an amazing journey called living on purpose:

1. Thumbs UP – Joy

The thumb stands for the things that you enjoy most.

What are the things that bring spark into you your life? What gives you natural joy?
If you have a day that you can spend as you like, what are the things that you would choose to do?

These are natural preferences that tie in beautifully with your purpose, even though it may not be very obvious how.

2. Index finger – Priority

Your Index finger points out your precedents.

What are your highest priorities in life? What do you value most in terms of your relationships, your work, social connections, life in general?

Your core virtues and what you value most are always aligned with your purpose

3. Middle finger (keep it down) – Fear

What is it that ignites fear in you? What tasks would make a huge difference in your life if you only were not so afraid of doing them?

Purpose is all about growth and expression. To keep you safe, your unconscious mind will look out for anything that it considers a thread to staying in your comfort zone and disguises it as “fear”.

When you start to investigate what is really holding you back you will be surprised to realise that more often than the fear of failure it is the fear of success that keeps you from achieving your goals.

4. Ring finger – Commitment

The fourth finger stands for your commitments.

What do you spend hours doing that feels like minutes? When are you loosing track of time? What do you do that others experience work but for you it’s play?

What could you talk about to people even if they aren’t really interested in what you have to say? What are you passionate about?

If you had a room that you could design specifically to suit your passion, what would it look like?

5. Little finger – Talent

Your little finger represents your talents.

What comes easy to you that others may find challenging? What do you have a natural talent for? When others come to you to ask for help, what is it they are expecting from you? What is it that do better than them? What´s the pattern?

Your talents will also always be aligned with your purpose.

Sometimes it is more difficult for us to see our talents than it is for those around us, because they are so natural and a matter of course for us, that we simply take them for granted and expect it to be that way for everyone.

If you experience these difficulties, simply ask your 5-10 best friends to independently write down what they think your 10 best talents are, then compare their answers. They may be very surprising!

So here you’ve got the 5-finger test that can give you some clues about your purpose.

Still without a clue?

If you are still absolute clueless because the test did not reveal anything to you, you might need support to dig even deeper than you dare to do on your own. You may very well be very close to uncovering your purpose, which might sound the alarm bell in your ego.

You always have the choice of opting out here and pretending that “others may have a purpose but I don’t and to be honest I don’t want to know!”, but there will always be the underlying question:

“What if….?”

What if you found your purpose and suddenly your life would make sense?

What if you finally knew how to best use your talents and live a life on your terms?

What if knowing your purpose would fill your life with meaning where there was none before?

What if finally knowing what you are designed to do would give you the peace and contentedness you have been searching, praying and hoping for so long?

What if not (daring  to) find you purpose will be the one thing that you will regret most at the end of your life?

There a many books out there that talk about finding your purpose. One I like to recommend is Tim Kelley`s True Purpose – 12 Strategies for Discovering the Difference You Are Meant to Make. It offers different strategies to choose from and gives explanations about the how, what, why, what-if question we face when we start pursuing our purpose.

Trying to discover your purpose can be challenging for many reasons. Having someone to hold you responsible for your commitments, to guide you when you are stuck, to explore with you why and challenge you when you get stuck or even just to acknowledge you when you have a breakthrough can make a huge difference.

Knowing that, Tim Kelley has trained a selected number of Purpose Coaches and I had the honour to work with one of them when I made the decision to take my life to another level.

Shiona Long, from Authentic Success, is one very talented and gifted Purpose Coach, who is walking the talk with passion and integrity. She patiently supported and challenged me on my journey of finding my purpose, which was the most important decision I ever made and the one that made me realise that there is a reason why I am who I am.

It was a wonderful, challenging, eye-opening, sometimes scary discovery.

I wish for you that discovering your purpose will be the key to unlock your potential, so that you can start or continue to even more purposefully let your unique light shine with courage, and as a result of that help to make this world a better place.

If you are looking for a parenting handbook, look no further. The Family Virtues Guide written by Linda Kavelin Popov offers you a manual that delivers the best foundation possible of how to raise a child in any culture or society.

Her ‘Simple Ways to Bring Out the Best in Our Children and Ourselves’ contain valuable insights in who our children really are, parenting principles and practices and how to apply The Family Virtues Guide in your family.

A description of 52 ‘Gifts Within’  helps to understand each virtue, why to practice it, how to practice it, how to recognise when a virtue is practised and when it needs more attention as well as an affirmation and a drawing to visualise an example.

It is a book that should be given or at least recommended to each new parent – the earlier the better.

Have a look inside and find out why The Family Virtues Guide is one of those books that have the potential to make the world a better place – one person at a time!

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. – John F. Kennedy

How is Gratitude related to the relief, management or prevention of stress?

It has been a big challenge for me to be grateful when I was younger and when things happened that either made no sense at that time, that confused me or that I did not like/want to be an experience in my life.

When I was challenged I tended to get upset either with myself, others or the situation. Blame was my good friend.

As you can imagine neither of this was very effective in terms of moving on. The worst experience was when I found out that my (then) husband had an affair with my best friend. That moment I felt like drawn into a black hole, spiraling downwards.

I went through the whole spectrum of negative emotions: anger, sadness, frustration, self-pity, fear, grief, aggression and once through started all over again. Only a few friends who really cared about me dared to be physically and mentally close when the ‘fire horse’ in me came out and the volcano was braking loose.

Today I have the deepest respect for these friends – I really wasn’t a pleasure to be around.

Fast forward 10 years. A few months ago I reconnected with ‘the adulteress’. To be honest, I was very surprised myself when I felt the need to get in contact with her. Even more as she tried to apologise for what happened (back then) and there was no way I would have even listened.

It feels really odd now to use the word adulteress, because this is not how I see her any more. Today I can see the pain that she went through herself. I no longer feel any kind of stress calling her name, while before I almost felt physical pain when I even only thought of her.

Besides time of course, there is one virtue that helped me to see this event differently now:

Gratitude

By practicing Nuad Thai – Traditional Thai Massage and studying its roots in Buddhist tradition as well as becoming a life coach I learned to take responsibility for my actions and my non-actions.

Instead of blaming others, I rather look for the gift in the situation and ask myself better questions:

What can I learn to avoid/do better next time?
How does this help me to grow?
How can I use this to become a better person?

By establishing some resources like a trusted source, a coach I can share insights with, journaling and meditation it is now easy and almost effortless to tap onto the power of Gratitude.

A heartfelt Thank-You to whoever you pray to invites harmony and instant relief to your life. The answer is often a knowing deep inside, that once you have accepted the gift of the situation as an opportunity for learning and growth, it will no longer cause any physical or mental stress.

How to practice Gratitude

Practicing Gratitude is very easy. To start with, ask yourself a simple question:

What happened today that you could choose to be grateful for?

Maybe you got a smile from a stranger, someone picked up your bag when it fell down, you got a nice call from a friend…

Even the simplest things can be a great source to experience Gratitude: the song of a bird, the beauty of a tree, the blue of the sky, a raindrop on a leaf…

Once you get in the habit of practicing Gratitude for the small things, you will find it easier to see the hidden presents in a situation that is more challenging.

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us. – Albert Schweitzer

Every person has a story and we are all connected.

The story of ‘The Little Soul And The Sun‘ by Neale Donald Walsh gives an insight of how each of us is a shining light and why sometimes the ones that bring us the biggest pain are those we need to show our deepest appreciation. (A review and summary will be available soon).

The Gift Of Gratitude

By practicing Gratitude you will connect with your higher spirit. This is one of the most powerful resources to increase the balance of your body, mind & spirit and will help you to stay much more relaxed when the road of life gets a bit bumpy and challenging.

I would like to share my gratitude for the organiser of the eco fiesta and lifestyle expo, who put together a wonderful event that enabled me to connect with new prospective and re-connect with existing friends.

My deepest appreciation goes to my husband Thomas and my youngest son Noah, who support me unconditionally in everything that I do and who enrich my life beyond words.

Each of my older children, Aaron, David and Lukas, gave my life a twist which was extremely valuable and I am grateful for their strong personalities and enriching characters.

To all my existing clients: your appreciation for my work makes my days. You are all precious to me and I cherish our relationship no matter how often or seldom we see each other.

Without the people who read this, I would just be talking to myself, so my Gratitude includes you as well.

And before this starts to sound like the acknowledgements in the foreword of a book, I stop here – curious to hear what you are grateful for today, tomorrow and the day after. Please share your thoughts and insights below. Thank you.

Out of twelve only one interpretation comes close to a meaning of Surrender that I prefer most:

To give up in favour of another

The question is: of another What?

Better indeed is knowledge than mechanical practice. Better than knowledge is meditation. But better still is surrender of attachment to results, because there follows immediate peace. – Bhagavad Gita

The Meaning of Surrender

I found that the mainstream belief about Surrender is that you have to give up something that you like or would like to have, like winning an argument for example. But what if the true meaning of Surrender is to attain something?

What if instead of insisting on ‘being right’ in a discussion you would surrender to the other person(s) point of view and gain insights that you otherwise would have missed?

Change is the essence of life. Be willing to Surrender what you are for what you could become. – Author unknown

Surrender goes hand in hand with Faith. They work best together and to embrace one fully, it is essential to accept the other too.

Once you can Surrender to Faith, the power of this combination will start to reveal itself to you in almost miraculous ways.

If you choose to accept the interpretation above for Surrender,  you can tap into the secret of true and lasting change that separates the ones who `try´ from the ones that actually achieve a permanent transformation.

Faith and Surrender – A Power Team

Change is mainly a two step process with a presupposition:

The assumption that needs to be accepted is that change is possible at all and can be done by yourself.

1. First you identify the  behaviour or belief  you want to change,
2. then you replace it with a new one.

If you give yourself permission to have Faith and to Surrender, you will feel a kind of acceptance and peace.

It was when I surrendered and trusted that I have every resource I need within me, when I was able to do things that took me a lot of courage to do like

• my first jump from a boat into the open sea (quite a big thing when you are as afraid of sharks as I am)
• leading a night dive
• Bungee Jumping

or that seem to be impossible like

• braking a wooden board without even touching it
• pricking a straw through an apple or
• breaking an arrow (that was put with its tip on my throat and was broken by leaning against it)

It was in the moment of making the conscious decision to Surrender my fears in exchange for Trust when I felt connected to the mighty power that is within everybody who dares to take that step and I know that Surrender will be my secret shield when I do a fire walk with Anthony Robbins. (More about these “Out with old excuses. In with new goals.”- events here )

The power of Surrender

Maybe you have experienced a similar moment. Maybe you did even scarier things like a sky dive or jumping out of a plane. Maybe you had really scary or life threatening moments when you thought you would die and when you then Surrendered to that possibility you have been given a second chance to live…

If you have, you will agree that the ‘Team Faith/Surrender‘ was there to support you and you will be able to remember how it felt to ‘be in the moment’ when everything around you happens like in slow motion.

Do you remember how radiant, vibrant, alive, excited, vivid and energetic you felt afterwards? How would you have completed this sentence:

“If I can do/survive this,…..  “?

If you haven’t had this kind of experience yet, when would be a good time to get out of your comfort zone and try something new (of course I am not talking about causing an accident here, right?)?
What would be one thing that you have put of until now, knowing that if you finally did it, it would make the difference in moving forward in your career, relationship or somehow else in your life?

What would it take to make that step?

Surrender – it will set yourself free.

Popular examples for an external universal trusted sources are God, Jesus, Mary, Allah, Buddha, Mohammed, Odin, Zeus, Grace, …
Their main characteristic is that they would know everybody’s purpose or answers to each person’s questions about life.

An external personal source could be a deceased loved one or a personal angel who is specifically assigned to you and only knows and cares about your purpose, no one else’s.

an internal source is something that you see as being a part of your self (but NOT your unconscious mind). It is an aspect of your psyche that can provide the answers you are looking for in terms of your purpose or other important aspects of your life.

There are three criteria that need to be fulfilled in order to define a trusted source:

You need to believe that

• it exists
• it already knows your purpose
• you can communicate with each other

You can learn more about trusted source and 12 Strategies for Discovering the Difference You Are Meant to Make in Tim Kelley’ book True Purpose.

In fact, responsibility is one of the key indicators to living authentically and taking your life in your own hands.

Responsibility is the thing people dread most of all. Yet it is the one thing in the world that develops us, gives us manhood or womanhood fiber. – Frank Crane

What Responsibility is not

Even though responsibility may appear to be an opportunity to load blame on someone else’s shoulder, this is not what it is about. This perception comes from misunderstanding the concept of responsibility.

When I was working in my first job as a sales representative in a (then) big company that produced, sold and maintained sewing machines, I was the PA to the Head of Department for Overseas Sales. He had a weird concept of responsibility:

Everything had to be reported to and endorsed by him, yet when something went wrong it was always us – the ones who were in “the lower hierachie” – who had to face the music.

While every day he gave us a lecture about how generously he gave us responsibility and freedom of choice how to get to a certain result, in fact there was only one way things had to be done: his.

If you are familiar with the term “This is how we do things, because they have always been done that way!”, you may be able to comprehend how not only frustrating, but also confusing it felt to get these contradictory messages.

Assigning responsibility to someone is not meant to be an excuse for having someone to blame in case something ‘goes wrong’ or does not work out as planned.
Neither is it meant to be a punishment as in “you asked for it, now deal with it”.

What is Responsibility?

Responsibility is a gift.

It is an opportunity to deal with an unexpected situation and find a satisfying solution, to make a choice how we want to respond to an event.

Things happen that we can’t control or influence, but what we can choose is our response to what is happening. Our response is always a choice.

Responsibilities gravitate to the person who can shoulder them. – Tom Stoppard

Here is an interesting equation:

Responsibility = Choice; Choice = Power;  that means:

Responsibility = Power, right? Right!

The Power is yours

The moment you choose to take on responsibility for your actions and for your non-actions is the beginning of a new life, a life that you then take in your own hands.

Feel this for a moment:
“It’s not my fault”;
“I didn’t ask for this”;
“There is nothing I can do”;

Can you see how powerless this comes across? I bet you can almost hear it being sad in a whining voice.

Now check this:
“I don’t like what happened, but what could it be good for?”
“What is the beauty/positive/learning in this?”
“How can I turn this around anyway?”

How does that feel?

Instead of reacting with a “Why me?”, how about taking on the challenge with a confident
“Bring it on – it’s me because I have the resources I need to deal with it!” Wouldn’t you agree that this is so much more powerful!

How could you change your life today if you would choose to see responsibility as a source of power?
How much more authentic could you live if you would accept that you have all the resources you need within you?
How relaxed would you be if you knew that responsibility is a gateway to peace, freedom and happiness?
What would it mean to you to know that you have everything you need to take your life in your own hands?

The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs. – Joan Didion

To find out where you have not yet fully taken responsibility for your life, send an e-mail to info[at]transitionguidance.com or call 07 4774 8146 today and ask for our free “Who’s Driving Your Bus?” assessment.

The power to take your life in your own hands can be yours. If you choose to accept the responsibility for it.

It was perfect timing.

Yesterday a friend of mine sent me an e-mail, reminding me about choice. We are choosing everything that comes into our life – consciously or unconsciously. We choose our reactions, we choose our thoughts, we choose our job, our partner, friends, associates and we choose our emotions.

In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility. – Eleanor Roosevelt

Any choice is our own responsibility. We CAN choose the meaning we give or how we want to react to the things that happen, how we want to feel or respond. So the question is, what do we choose?

As I said, this email was a great reminder and came at the perfect time.

Two days ago I have ‘lost a baby’. Well, it was not yet a baby, merely a foetus, as I was only in the early stages of pregnancy and there had not been much bonding yet. Still it felt like a big loss to me – then.

Being in physical pain, I was looking for distraction. First I canceled all appointments to allow time for my body to heal. Then I made a few phone calls to share the ‘sad news’ with my close friends. After some logistic arrangements were sorted to pick up my son from school, there was nothing left to consider but me and my thoughts.

The lady at the doctor’s reception had suggested to get home and watch all the movies that I hadn’t had time to watch for a while. Even though I liked the idea, it was hard to choose which one would be appropriate, even more with a limited DVD library like ours. (I even felt almost ‘guilty’ for sitting and watching while my husband was working)

So I went through some of my usual favourites that I can normally watch at any time:

The Birdcage – too funny. Legends Of The Fall – too sad.
Forrest Gump – too innocent. Don Juan de Marco – too sexy.
A Disney, Pixar or Dreamworks movie – after the 1000th time: too boring. X-Men, Spiderman, Batman – too exciting.
Lord of the Rings – too gloomy and melancholic (would there be time for the whole trilogy anyway??). Dirty Dancing – too shallow (and with an intentional abortion too inappropriate!).
Chocolat – wonderful, but just not right.

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button – Just right! And just recently arrived from Germany, it was great to watch it in my mother language and get some of the little distinctions that got lost in translation at the movies.

Still – the inevitable thoughts and questions can be postponed, but they come back to bite when the distraction is gone. So I chose to surrender.

I went through the thoughts that came up:

In relation to BODY:

Am I too old? Couldn’t I give enough nutrients? Am I not fit enough? Are my eggs too weak? Would the child have been disabled?

In relation to MIND:

Did I worry too much? Did I focus on the negative things that could happen? Was it a girl who didn’t want to stay because I wished for another boy? What if….?

In relation to SPIRIT:

Did this little soul not feel welcome? Was it there to tell me something and what could that be?

There are countless possible answers to these questions, all of which could be right as much as they could be wrong.

So it was on me to make a choice:

Will I give in to grief and blame or will I accept the gifts of the event?

Looking back I decided that I have had enough attention and self-pity to  please the ego and that is was time to move forward.

So I choose to believe that this little soul wanted to give me the opportunity to revise my life, especially in terms of my family and my business.
There are a lot of decisions to be made in relation to both that I procrastinated (yes, I do this too!) to address, to act on or to consider.

I chose to believe that it is the chance for me to increase my fitness, to actually start the journey of transforming my body to how I want it to be and to become healthier overall.

I chose to believe that I I have not lost a baby, but finally found the ‘trusted source’ I have been looking for to talk to and that ‘Anna’ (how I wish to call the little soul) has come into my life to let me know that she is there to help me find some answers and define my purpose even clearer.

I chose to believe that this was a blessing and I chose to be grateful for the experience.

In life we don’t get what we want, we get what we expect.

(original source unknown, quoted by Chris Howard)

I was hoping for a sign and I got it in an unexpected way, but it reminded me that we can expect answers if we dare to ask and if we are willing to take responsibility for our choices. This is why I consciously choose to raise my standards and get very clear about my expectations from this life.

My message to you today is simple: don’t wait for a defining moment to remind you that you have all it takes to take your life in your hands.

Why am I sharing such a personal experience?

My hope is that by sharing this I can maybe help to raise the awareness that we always have a choice – at least how we choose to respond to what is happening to or around us. If that makes only one person question their current perception that “there is nothing I can do” and that helps to realise that we are much more powerful than we think we are, it maybe makes his or her day.

If that person than realises that it is time to step up and move out of the publicly so well accepted victim mentality that keeps your personal energy on a low level, it will make my day.

If this person than becomes who he or she really is, who knows whose day this will make?

We are role models for someone – how not to do it or how to do it. Will you live with your light dimmed or will you shine?

Your turn

Make a conscious choice today to design your own destiny. You are the master of your life. Skip the yeah-buts, the what-ifs and the couldna, shouldna, wouldna…

To live is to choose. But to choose well, you must know who you are and what you stand for, where you want to go and why you want to get there. – Kofi Annan

If the ‘WHY’ is big enough, the ‘HOW’ will take care of itself.

Transition Guidance is here to help you find, refine or re-define your why and to align it with your values (what you stand for), so that everything you do will move you towards this purpose (who you are) and achieving your goals (where you want to go).

To find out where you have made the (conscious or unconscious) choice to give your personal power away and how to make your own choices, apply for a free “Who’s Driving Your Bus”-assessment via phone (07 4774 8146 or 0439 265 230) or e-mail (info[at]transitionguidance.com) today.

Please share your thoughts, any insights or similar stories below. Your input is much appreciated.

This is one of my favourite topics!

That does not necessarily mean that I have mastered the art of de-cluttering -  au contraire mon ami! But it is a very powerful strategy to get major results with minor effort.

Clutter is as dangerous for the body as it is for the mind and the spirit.

So-called ‘messies’ have their disability to think in structured and organised ways reflected in their compulsion to hord things, which gives them a sensation of safety and worthiness. They have a very strong need to collect anything to an extend that goes way beyond ‘normal household amounts’- tins, cans, newspapers, clothes, pegs, cords and strings, pens and papers, toys, batteries, …  It takes a lot of patience and ‘digging deep’ to help those people raise their self-esteem and worthiness to live a ‘normal life’ independently from those ‘accessories’.

The word clutter is used here for anything that can be categorised as being an unnecessary add-on or something that goes beyond a healthy amount in presence.

Examples and Consequences of  BODY-Clutter

• toxins from nutrition or the environment – block cells and flow of energy, causes skin problems
• high insulin level -thickens the blood and damages arteries and body tissue
• increased cholesterol level – causes blockages in arteries and slows down blood flow
• increased adrenalin production – disables the production of serotonin, our happiness hormone
• higher acid than alkaline levels – results in indigestion (burping, bloating, heavy feeling after eating, flatulence)
• and of course an over-intake of fat that is stored in the body and leads to being overweight or even obesity.

De-cluttering your BODY

Examples of cleaning processes for the body are:

• fasting
• detoxing
• sweating (sauna or steam bath)
• a relaxation or specialised massage (Shiatsu, Indian Head Massage, Nuad Thai or a Thai Herbal massage)
• change of diet
• change of lifestyle

Daily Life Experience

Studies have shown that a person who has a lot of clutter in his or her home will find it very hard to lose weight (and most of them are overweight!). I can personally second that.

Every time I decide it’s time to de-clutter a pantry or the garage, I observe that my body wants to join in and that any usual cravings for sweets magically turn into a desire for ‘healthy food’.

Examples and Consequences of  MIND-Clutter

• other people’s beliefs – can override your self-esteem
• too many ‘shoulds’ – leave no or only little room for wants
• overestimating how much can be done in a certain amount of time – feelings of overwhelm (leading to spirit-clutter)
• beliefs that do not serve, support or nurture your purpose or goals – distract you from  living your potential
• unfinished ideas, projects, plans, life goals – feelings of frustration and failure (spirit-clutter that can lead to overeating and as a result to body-clutter)

De-cluttering your MIND

Examples for cleaning processes for the mind are:

• letting go of other people’s beliefs
• learning to say “No”
• choosing to focus on the good things that have happened or may be happening during the day
• expressing your passion in a creative way (through paintings, music, dance or any other kind of art)
• examining and balancing your personal energy centres (chakras)

Daily Life Experience

Every time, as soon as I start the process of sorting, throwing or giving away, my mind goes crazy with ideas for products, projects or services I could offer to improve people’s lives.

I have exercise books full of book titles, workshop topics, product ideas that would complement any health and wellbeing strategy and I am looking forward to sharing them with you one at a time.

Examples and Consequences of  SPIRIT-Clutter

• pent-up anger – aggression, unreasonable and irrational behaviour
• unresolved frustration – impatience, overeating
• the use of emotions to get attention – un-resourceful choices of behaviour (self-pity, moodiness,..), giving away responsibility and personal power

De-cluttering your SPIRIT

• re-aligning with your values
• studying and practising emotional intelligence
• exploring and resolving issues and events in the past that may have caused a ripple effect of emotions (and limiting beliefs)

Daily Life Experience

My spirit feels very peaceful after a completed de-clutter-action, as if a load has been taken away that I was not aware of before. Many other people have confirmed the same or very similar experiences.

Coaching has helped me to let go of or learn to deal with  many emotions that are neither serving nor supporting or serving me in my purpose to help people to balance and relax their body, mind and spirit and to spread ‘contagious wellbeing’.

There are many tools and strategies available to help you do the same. Some are easy ‘Do-It-Yourself’ tactics, which I will share here and in my book, some require assistance or guidance, which I am happy to provide through my programs, treatments and services.

Walking the Talk

While I was re-structuring my business, I found it very relieving to start a new website, because the old one was getting very complex and unclear. I can see the same pattern happening with this one as I am redefining the purpose and intention of myself, my work and the way I try to reach my audience.

This website will therefore undergo a renovation process to which I am looking forward to. I invite you to leave any suggestions of how I can increase the usability of these pages and welcome any feedback  on what is missing, what is too much, what is confusing, misleading, distracting or in any other way an overload of information.

Please also feel free to share what you like and what you would miss if it would be gone as well as any ideas what can be improved or enquiries what you would love to read about in regards to balance and relaxation for body, mind and spirit. Your input is very valuable and much appreciated and I thank you in advance.