New Year’s Resolutions anyone?

When I spoke to the elderly part in my family to wish them a Happy New Year, I asked whether they had made any New Year’s Resolutions.

The answers were quite shocking: “I am not setting any goals, I will take life as it comes.” or “Why would I want to make any resolutions, if I won’t achieve them anyway?”  or ” I have set resolutions before and did not achieve them. Why should it be different this time?”

So what are the ingredients for not only setting powerful goals, but also making sure you will accomplish them? The 3 Steps to Accomplish This New Year’s Resolutions may give you the answer you have been looking for.

1. Make sure your resolutions meet the S.M.A.R.T.I.E. conditions

When I hear that someone is not setting goals, a quote from Greg Anderson comes to my mind:

When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, by dreams that need completion, by pure love that needs expressing — then we truly live life.

I have met a number of people who told me that they find it stressful to set goals for themselves. They assume that goal setting is only for those who thrive to be successful, that it is something mysterious or even unethical.

“You gotta work hard for your money, son!” or “The one who flies high will eventually fall deep”, are sayings that support that thinking and I can imagine how ’setting goals’ becomes a weird and mystic task, something that only bosses or the rich and famous do.

In “The Strangest Secret“, Earl Nightingale is talking about success and why so many people don’t achieve it. He says that “These people believe that their lives are shaped by circumstances, by things that happen to them, by exterior forces. They are auto directed people.”

There is  an expression that I heard on a number of personal development workshops that support that thought:

If you don’t have goals for yourself, others will have goals for you.

Benjamin A. Mays put it this way:

It must be born in mind that the tragedy of life does not lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy of life lies in having no goal to reach.

Kahlil Gibran (“The Prophet“) said:

By losing your goal, you have lost your way.

So how do you set a powerful goal? First you have to make sure that it complies with the SMARTIE criteria:

S – Specific and Simple

Make it simple and specific. “I don’t want to be alone” is a simple statement, but it is far from being specific. With goal setting it is important to say what you want, not what you don’t want.

Have you ever heard the expression “What you focus on is what you get”? That’s what Specific and Simple is about: Say not what you don’t want, but what you want. Focus on the positive.

How would you like not to be alone? Do you want a partner, a lover, children, grand children, a friend, be part of a club or the community? What do you want, specifically?

M – Measurable

This one goes hand in hand with the one above. “I want more money” is simple, positive and more or less specific, but it is not measurable. How much is more? Is it one dollar or 10, 100 or thousands?

Make sure there is a number involved. In case it can’t be measured by numbers, imagine a scale from 1-10, where 10 is where you want to be. What are the criteria that need to be fulfilled for you to be at a 10? Write them down as a tick-off list.

A – Achievable and Attainable by you, As if now

Again, make it your goal, one that you can achieve by yourself. It is not about your partner, family, child or the world, it is not someone else’s goal, it is yours!

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present. – Babatunde Olatunji

Some languages have no grammar for future or past. They totally live in the here and now. Use present tense when you write down your goal. “I am…, I have…” are the most powerful words on earth, in any language.

R – Realistic

If you have set goals before and not achieved them, maybe they have been set too high. Making a million in a year could be a bit challenging if you are earning 50.000 a year and have no savings and no plan.

On the other side, if you have always achieved your goals without effort, challenge your self. Stretch a little further than comfortable, you will grow into it.

T – Time frame

Give your goal a time frame, have a date involved. “By December 31st 2010 …” or “the 15th of May2015…” will make your goal even more measurable, specific and easy to plan for.

I – Inspirational

Often money comes up in goal setting. But is it really about the money? I don’t think so. Generally it is about what you can or want to do with the money. What is it that inspires you to get up? What motivates you to persevere when times get tough?

When a goal is not about money but what really inspires you, you may suddenly find other ways to achieve it.

Be open and allow the universe or God to provide for you in whatever way they may think is appropriate. Extend your opportunities by making your goal inspirational.

E – Evidence and Endstep

What is the final thing that needs to happen for you to know that you have achieved your goal? What is the picture that you see, what do you hear or tell yourself, how do you feel?

What is the evidence that proofs you have made it? For example when do you know you have lost enough weight? Is it when you see a certain number standing on your scale? When you fit in your favourite dress or pants? When you have achieved a certain fat percentage? Or when the tape measure shows a specific number?

Make your Evidence and Endstep very clear and involve as many senses as possible: see, hear, feel, smell or taste your success.

2. Check whether they stand the C.A.R.Y. criteria

By now your goals or resolutions should be very powerful already.

Check again whether they stand the CARY criteria with these four questions:

C – Is your goal or resolution something you can CONTROL?
A – Is this goal what this is really ABOUT?
R – Is this goal something that you REALLY want?
Y – Are you doing this for YOURSELF?

If you say “YES!” to all four, congratulations. You are only one step away from accomplishing this year’s resolutions. Here is the final step:

3. Create a strategy that supports you when the going gets tough

Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success. – Stephen A. Brennan

When we study why most people fail to accomplish their new year’s resolutions, two things again and again come up as obviously being the main reasons for will later be called failure:

Lack of plan and lack of action.

Brian Tracy said:

The most important key to achieving great success is to decide upon your goal and launch, get started, take action, move.

By now you have decided on your goal. In order to launch, to start your journey, it is important to have a GPS or roadmap.

What is your strategy? Will you go by foot, bike, car, ship, plane? Will you need a partner or a team? What kind of equipment is necessary? Have you got enough power or fuel? Where will you stay or have a rest? Do you need to book something in advance? What if there are unexpected road works, delays, or other obstacles? Have you got a Plan B?

Having a functional strategy is a crucial ingredient to accomplish a goal. It will help you to stay on track or get back on it easily after you have hit a hitch.

One word about obstacles: when you are on your way, it may excite you to hear that humps are in fact a good sign. They mean that you are moving towards your goal, because otherwise you would not come across them. The more you hit, the better. With each one it is more likely that after the next you will bump into your goal.

Keep on going, persevere! Remember what inspired you to set the goal in first place. You have made your goal inspirational, have you?

When a goal matters enough to a person, that person will find a way to accomplish what at first seemed impossible. – Nido Qubein

Still, I understand that sometimes everything seems to be too hard. It is challenging to keep the motivation high when all you see is stop signs.

Here is one more secret weapon to accomplish any resolution or goal once and for all:

Find yourself someone who will

  • hold you accountable,
  • help you to design your strategy,
  • lift you up when you’re feeling down,
  • keep the faith in you when you don’t,
  • cheer when do,
  • help you to reconnect with your resources when you think you have none left,
  • give you a kick when you need it most and no one else would dare to do it,
  • care for you but is not emotionally attached to you,
  • make sure you will walk the talk

This can be a really good friend, a remote relative, a colleague or professional in the same industry, a mentor or a coach. Make sure that they know what you want to achieve and why, how you want them to hold you accountable, what would motivate you and what would not.

Athletes and other professionals are choosing coaches for a reason, a season or a lifetime. You can too. Accountability Coaching is one of the powerful strategies we at Transition Guidance use to make sure you will accomplish this year’s resolutions and make 2010 your best year ever.

What are your resolutions or goals for this year?
How do you make sure you accomplish them?
How will you celebrate your success?

Please leave your comment below for the inspiration of others. Who knows, maybe you will be able to hook up with someone like-minded?

Related Posts with Thumbnails